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Michael le Boeuf - Worry people think Quote

"As for worrying about what other people might think - forget it. They aren't concerned about you. They're too busy worrying about what you and other people think of them."

-- Michael le Boeuf


Learning to Concentrate and Focus

Written by Shane Butler Friday, 07 May 2010 03:48


No matter who you are or what your occupation may be, you will need to concentrate and focus. Whether you are a student, an office worker, or even someone involved in manual labor such as in the construction field, one thing is sure – you will need to devote time and energy to concentration and focus on your occupation and especially the task at hand.


But first of all, just what is concentration? Concentration is defined as deep mental attention towards an object or subject. If you are concentrating on something, you devote all your attention to it.


So, what is the difference between concentration and focus?


Focus would be how you narrow in on the center or core of that which you are concentrating on. So you could be concentrating on something but perhaps not be focused on the main part or issue. If you were really interested in that object or person, and devoted all of your concentration on it, it can probably be said that you are focused.


So how do you learn to focus (meaning you improve the level of your concentration)?


First, you have to accept that there are two types of individuals out there. You could be the type that has learned how to deal with frustration or you could be the type that has not. If you believe you are the former yet find it hard to finish the task you are working on – remember, you can still do more than what you believe you can do. This means really pushing yourself to develop mental stamina by going beyond the point of frustration. Just keep working despite the feeling that you want to give up and you will develop mental endurance.


Second, if you have a tendency to become scatterbrained, try bribing your mind. Do one task at a time but impose time limits – this will prevent your mind from focusing on other less important tasks.  Also, remember this doesn't mean you are ADHD.  Everyone has some characteristics of ADHD or ADD from time to time.  But if you are concerned about it, go read this great book, 'Delivered from Distraction', written by Edward M. Hallowell M.D. and John J. Ratey M.D..  (Two highly successful ADHD Doctors)  It's a great at looking at the positive side of ADHD also.

Delivered from Distraction Book


Third, if you still can’t seem to focus, write down your concerns, inspired ideas etc. on a 'to-do' list. This allows you to clear some space in your mind for the immediate task or activity, rather than use your mind as a bulletin board.


Fourth, it's vital to move past the urge to procrastinate. If you have a task to do, and you want to postpone it, ask yourself:
Should I do this?
If I do it, will I keep worrying about it?
If I postpone it, will it be easier to do later?

By asking yourself those 3 key questions, you can gain the motivation to mentally apply yourself towards finishing your goal.  Also, like most things, it's easier when you have a habit.  Make a habit of getting things done right away or at the planned time, every time.

Remember,  figure out how you work and function, make sure to get enough sleep and proper nutrition, and make wise and healthy habits.

A Pot of Oil -- A Simple Pot of Oil

Last Updated on Thursday, 06 May 2010 15:34 Written by John Harricharan Saturday, 01 May 2010 00:00

How often do we come to a place in life where we feel
there is no hope, no purpose for going on, no anything
to live for? Some of us come to this place often while
others just visit once in a while. But I am sure, most
of us have been there one time or another.

During such times, the pain is intense, the fear is
beyond comprehension and the confusion is great. What
do we do at such times? Where do we go? Who do we ask
for help? Where do we turn?

I have always maintained that there are only three
problems in life -- money, health and relationships. Any
or all of these three could turn us around from
self-confident, happy human beings into fearful, sad
and hopeless underlings.

But there is always hope, always help if we can clear
our heads, still our minds and listen to the deep calm
voice that comes from somewhere deep within us. This
voice has always been there and it will continue to be
there. All we have to do is listen.

By being quiet within and listening to the guidance
that comes from our soul, we will be led to take the
right actions, meet the right people, ask the right
questions and find the perfect solution to the problem
which haunts us.

The story is told of a prophet of God who was visiting
a small town. It is an ancient story and holds a secret
to solving all our problems. In that town lived a woman
whose husband had died and left her with tremendous

In those days, if you were unable to pay your debts,
the creditor took your children as bond servants until
the debt was paid. The woman was beside herself with
fear and anxiety. She had two sons whom she loved
dearly and could not think of losing them.

In a rare moment of quiet, she had the insight to meet
the prophet as he came to town and to ask his advice.
So as the man of God approached, she ran up to him and
told him of her plight.

As I sit here writing this, I can almost see the tired
face of the woman as the prophet looked at her and
asked her what is it that she wanted. She told him
about the death of her husband and about the creditors
who were about to come and take her sons away. She
explained how times were hard and how she had no money
to pay. She seemed to be at the end of her rope.

The holy man had compassion on her and asked, "What do
you have in the house?"

"Nothing, O man of God," she replied, "except a small
pot of olive oil."

"Go," said the prophet, "You and your sons, and borrow
as many pots as you can. Then take the pots into your
house, close the door and pour the oil you have into

Surely she must have thought him mad, but nevertheless,
she did as he suggested. And then the miracle occurred.
The pot of oil she had, filled all the pots she had
borrowed and only when all were filled did the oil stop

She went back and thanked the man of God, who said to
her, "Now, go sell the oil. You will have enough to
repay your creditors and to live comfortably."

This story was taken from the book of Second Kings,
chapter 4 and it carries a simple message for all of
us. When besieged by problems that seem insurmountable,
stop, be quiet and ask yourself this question: "What do
I have in the house?"

You may not think that you have anything, but you would
be wrong. Each and every one of us has a "pot of oil".
It may appear insignificant to us most times, but it is
still our pot of oil. Our "pot of oil" might be our
ability to sing, to write, to fix a car, to do Internet
marketing, to comfort others, to communicate
brilliantly, to pray deeply, to heal others ? whatever
it is, let's not ignore it.

Trust that you are a child of the universe with all the
help you need. You were not just thrown here on a
seemingly inhospitable planet that has seen its share
of pain, sadness, terror, poverty, distrust and all
negative things. We are not trapped by the ups and
downs of the Dow Jones average, or the numbers on the
401k. We are not slaves to the economy nor are we
horrid creatures to be punished for our past failings,
although we can choose to believe any or all of these.

We are bright, beautiful children of this space-time
and we have within us a "pot of oil" that no one else
has. We are unique in all of Eternity. Let us discover
this "pot of oil" and use it to bring us joy, peace and
all good things.

Do not be afraid or too proud to ask others for help.
There is another powerful saying that goes like this:
"Ask and ye shall receive, seek and ye shall find and
knock and it shall be opened unto you."

An old man I met by the sea one day, long ago, said to
me, "Go to God first and then to man as God directs." I
never forgot his words of wisdom. Approach your God
with hope and trust. Then listen for the guidance,
which is always there. Follow the guidance and your
"pot of oil" will overflow into all areas of your life.

Do not take my word for it. All you have to do is try
it for yourself. You'll be amazed how seemingly
impossible problems disappear as the mists before the
morning sun. Look deep within you and then look way
beyond you. And remember, to solve your problems
quickly, help others solve theirs.

Written by John Harricharan and used with permission.


Dr. Seuss Be who you are Quote

Written by Shane Butler Wednesday, 28 April 2010 20:59

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.

~ Dr. Seuss

5 Tips to Coping with Changes in Your Life

Last Updated on Tuesday, 27 April 2010 21:20 Written by Shane Butler Friday, 23 April 2010 21:42

We all experience some form of change in our lives. This is most evident in the development and growth we undergo from infancy to adulthood.  We started out in this world unable to walk or talk and now you may be reading this article from a computer at work or on a mobile phone at a local hotspot, while waiting to meet someone.

However, while there are changes that come naturally and are, therefore, inevitable, there are those sorts of changes that seem to derail us from the "plans" we have set for ourselves. Not all change seems good – that's a fact. Some changes are empowering, but some may be depressing. When the latter happens, most of us just tend to raise our hands in defeat and give up.

However, we shouldn't wave the white flag at challenges so easily. Are you familiar with the sayings,"what does not kill you only makes you stronger," or "we aren't given what we can't bear"? These apply here and now. While change is constant and cannot be prevented, we can all find ways to regulate our responses to it, not only to keep our sanity intact, but we can also learn and grow from these changes.

Here are five suggestions to coping with life changes smoothly.

1. Accept that change is inevitable.

The first step to coping with change is acknowledging that it exists and that it is there.  It IS going to happen. Running away from it and pretending it doesn't exist will tend to only make matters worse.
For instance, if all of a sudden the main person you've been talking to for the past few months now backed out and decided not to go through with your aggreement, it doesn't do well to lock yourself up in your bedroom and cry for a week or using mind numbing chemicals. Try to resolve the issue with the other person and discuss, calmly, the reasons for the change of heart. Especially try to see their point of view, and share your point of view in a loving and peaceful manner.

2. There are many paths to choose from.

If things do not go your way and/or they deviate from your plan, try another way. There are many alternatives to achieve your goals and desires if only you become more open to them. When you set a plan, always realize that many things can happen along the way, and that you don't always win how you think you will. Have a plan B, plan C, plan D, and so forth. Or, even if you don't have contingency plans, acknowledge that you have many other options besides the one you already set your mind to.  Keep the principle of your end goal in mind and be flexible in how to achieve it AND still maintain your morals and principles.

3. Keep a positive attitude.

Sure, change can be stressful. However, you can try to make it less painful and stressful by looking at the brighter side of things. So your date cancelled at the last minute? Not what you wanted but hey, No sweat. At least, now, you have some time to spend with your family or friends, or get to enjoy some alone time. Go get a massage or treat yourself to that book you've wanted to check out and a fun treat. Sometimes, when "bad" changes happen, it is usually to open doors for a new and better event to come in.  So don't judge it as "bad". 

4. You are not alone.

Everyone experiences change. Thus, you should not single yourself out and play hermit. Go out and talk with positive friends and trusted mentors. Enjoy your time. Laugh at the challenges together.

5. Welcome it with open arms.

You've probably heard this, when God closes a door, He opens a window. Whatever your spiritual beliefs are, see the change as an opportunity to be introduced to new things and a chance to make improvements in your life. This is the time to tinker with the things you might have overlooked with your original plan. Look for the positive points and potential.  Savor the moment and smile.


As you finish reading this,  feel free to notice what you didn't like about the situations and changes, but then write down or take note of what you have learned and gained from them.  Then write down what you would like to happen next and take some inspired action to make that happen.

Make note of, or even write down what you are grateful for each and every day. This is one of the most powerful things you can do to reach your desires.

Success to you!




Check out some of these resources...


Transitions Counseling

Eliminate Your Stress Using the Sedona Method


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